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Tanked And Wasted
04:19
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TANKED AND WASTED
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE OUR CHRISTMAS
THE FAMILY'S THERE FOR FEAST
CHRISTMAS LIGHTS ARE SHINING
THE GIFTS UNDER THE TREE
THE MUSIC IT WAS HOPPING
IT SHOOK THE WHOLE DAMN FLOOR
THE WHOLE HOUSE SHE WAS ROCKIN'
WHEN A KNOCK CAME AT THE DOOR
NEVER THOUGHT I'D SEE THIS
SANTA CAME TODAY
HE HAD HIS SACK OF PRESENTS
AND HIS REINDEER PULLING SLEIGH
BUT SANTA LOOKED QUITE DIFFERENT
HE STAGGERED TO AND FROW
LEANED OVER MY RAILING
AND THREW UP IN THE SNOW
Chorus
SANTA'S TANKED AND WASTED X2
SANTA PUSHED HIS WAY RIGHT INTO OUR HALLWAY
YELLING "MERRY CHRISTMAS HO,HO,HO"
GRABBED MY COUSIN GERTRUDE ACROSS HER SHOULDERS
AND KISSED HER UNDERNEATH THE MISTLETOE
HE TOOK A BIG SWIG OF MY TEQUILA
CRASHED HIS CHUNKY ASS RIGHT THROUGH OUR DOOR
HOW DO WE EXPLAIN THIS TO THE CHILDREN
THAT SANTA IS NOW PASSED OUT IN OUR FLOOR
TANKED AND WASTED
((((Thanks Shelly,
I'm live on scene where Santa has crashed the party.
He threw up outside the house prior to
Rushing over to the table where the family meal was on display
He shoved the father out of the way before digging in to the feast.
He was quoted as saying,
"This will do quite nicely, Mrs. Claus can't cook like this"
He grabbed onto the gravy boat and slammed it back.
The family said they want the sled removed from their lawn and said that, Santa smelled like piss))))
THIS PUTS US IN A STICKY SITUATION
ONE OF THOSE THERE IS NO PLANNING FOR
HOW ARE WE NOW GONNA TELL THE CHILDREN?
THEIR HERO IS NOW PASSED OUT ON OUR FLOOR
THERE WON'T BE MILK AND COOKIES ON THE TABLE
NO TREATS OR CELERY LEFT OUT THIS DAY
SANTA HE IS GONNA NEED AN ASPRIN
CAUSE WHEN HE COMES TO HE'LL JUST WHISP AWAY
SANTA'S TANKED AND WASTED
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